In such a situation, there is often a lot of stress, some conveyed openly, some hidden stress that is often even more damaging that what is conveyed. In my encounters with everyone with a challenge, I have often seen a lot of disconnects that alienate the person and even the family.
Another common occurrence is excessive mollycoddling in the name of care. The person going through the health challenge is discouraged from doing anything constructive and therefore starts associating himself or herself with the ailment instead of just viewing it as something that needs to be handled. Care of course may be necessary but not a patronizing attitude. Often, there is a lot of confusion between the two.
Some others do not wish to do anything to help in the healing process. Many attempts at overcoming limitations, if any, are met with cynicism.
In my own case,when I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, we were shocked, confused and then of course, under a lot of stress. Now, I have overcome this largely because of the tremendous love and support I have received. Apart from working on my own attitudes and the alternative therapies that helped me heal, I am certain that nothing would ever have been effective without the power of love that my family, particularly my husband has shown and demonstrated.
When there were failures in some therapies, he just brushed it aside and without preaching, asked me also to treat it as a minor event. When he saw improvement, he lent his quiet and stable support. Most of all, he never made me feel I was a patient and naturally, the whole world or should I say ‘my world’ also never treated me as a patient. In fact, I have done much more in my years with multiple sclerosis than my years without it. Our relationship has now become stronger, more robust and I am certain it will remain so or perhaps become even more stronger till the end of our lives.
Now, I can certainly say I have indeed healed with the power of love and request everyone, challenge or not, to work on keeping all their relationships robust and healthy.